Fitting In and the
Chameleon
As we sat in our
lawn chairs in the backyard enjoying the late afternoon sun, I was startled by
the sound of splashing water. I quickly turned to see what was making that
noise since our little Pekin ducks, which had been playing in the wading pool, were
now out and walking around the back of the lot.
The source of the
noise was quickly seen to be our dog Lucy, jumping around and splashing noisily
in the pool like she was a duck.
Lucy was our loved
Corgi that had come upon the scene a
few
years earlier, first appearing as a small head with big ears, dark eyes barely peering
out from the woods. She obviously had no home and was
living off the land as best a small dog can do. She soon became our dog and
seemed happy enough to have a regular meal schedule and a warm bed.
Lucy quickly appointed
herself mother and protector of our ducks and she was always with them,
guarding them from the occasional coyote and from the hawks which flew overhead
peering down at a possible duck dinner!
Lucy seemed to love mothering and
watching over the little quackers and the praise we gave her for being such a
good guardian.
On this day, she had
been watching the ducks as they did their joyous “duck things”, frolicking and diving
underwater, then surfacing and shaking, flapping their stubby wings, swimming,
diving back down underwater, and repeating the process. As the ducks finally got out of the pond and
wandered away, apparently little tinges of jealousy started pulling at Lucy. When
we looked back at the pond, there she was in the pool, ducking under the water, getting
up shaking, diving again into the water mimicking everything that the ducks had
done except her quack quack sounded more like a bark, bark.
She was trying to “Fit
In”.
 |
| MAYBE FITTING IN IS GOOD IDEA HERE!! |
She wanted to be
accepted and loved like the ducks were,
I guess, even to the extent of changing her behavior and normal inclinations
since she had never shown an affinity for water. She must have thought those actions caused us
to love those ducks and she wanted part of that love!.
In my own
experience I have faced the temptation to ”Fit In”, to go outside of what I
knew was right for me, to act contrary to what I believed in and what I stood
for, and what I knew about myself. I wanted to “Fit In” and not stand out as different from the group as
an “odd ball”, to not draw attention to myself, my ideas, my principles. How
much easier it seems to be “one of the gang” than to stand for something. It
wasn’t very comfortable but it was EASY. Doing the wrong thing can be Easy but
it isn’t very satisfying or comfortable.
I remember a helpful slogan I heard years ago
that said, “If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything”.
In recalling some
of those moments from years past I was reminded of the story a friend, Howard,
told me long ago. He cautioned me about being a Chameleon and explained
how Chameleons change their color to “Fit In” with their environment. He made it pretty clear that I should avoid
that temptation and stand up for what I believed in, that I should reflect on
the outside the qualities that I cherished in my heart.
While appearing to
be one thing while you are actually something else inside, just to “Fit In”, is good for a
lizard, but it is often a treacherous trap for humans
In a world where the
lure of drugs and alcohol, the temptation to shortcut, stretch the truth, discuss
with heated temper politics and social issues, to gossip about and show no
respect for others… so many temptations,
we sometimes edge more toward being the Chameleon,
perhaps hiding our true nature and feelings rather than standing firm on
principle.
The Bible contains
many wonderful examples of Chameleon disguises versus standing firm with
honesty and integrity, and also shows that things don’t change very much from
century to century, as the same temptations we face were present in Jesus' time as well.
In the lifetime of
Jesus many people undoubtedly discussed disease, blindness, physical
disability, deafness, leprosy, immorality, and many other issues. Jesus
didn’t fall in with the group and talk about how terrible it was that these
diseases were present, didn’t spend time criticizing the government nor gather
with the group to pass judgment and cast stones at sinners. . He stood firm
with his understanding that God, who he understood to be Divine Love, the Mind that
created ALL, did not create evil, disease or death, but Life Eternal. He didn’t worry about
being “different” and healed and uplifted those in need in spite of those who
resisted or ridiculed him.
In contrast, Judas, one of the 12 disciples, typified the
Chameleon in the most hurtful way. While in his chameleon outfit he was outwardly
loyal to Jesus, but he betrayed him to the soldiers, an attempt to Fit In with
the authorities. Matthew 26
And, even Peter, a loyal disciple who loved and was loved by Jesus
fell into the trap. He wore the chameleon outfit when Jesus was arrested
and taken to the high priest, and tried to
Fit In with those who claimed they did not know Jesus, and denied being a
disciple. He was later so ashamed of his
actions but he did prove that even those with high ideals and standards can fall
victim to the lizard influence! Matthew 26
So, whatever the motive, we can and must drop the "act". Mary Baker Eddy in
her Miscellaneous Writings sums up helpful guidance for the principled
individual. Urging integrity and sincerity in each of our lives, she counsels: "The upright man is guided by a fixed
Principle, which destines him to do nothing but what is honorable, and to abhor
whatever is base or unworthy; hence we find him ever the same, — at all times the trusty friend, the affectionate relative, the
conscientious man of business, the pious worker, the public-spirited
citizen.
He assumes no
borrowed appearance. He seeks no mask to cover him, for he acts
no studied part; but he is indeed what he appears to be, — full of truth, candor, and humanity. In all his
pursuits, he knows no path but the fair, open, and direct one, and would
much rather fail of success than attain it by reproachable means. He never
shows us a smiling countenance while he meditates evil against us in his
heart. We shall never find one part of his character at variance with
another. Miscellaneous Writings pp147
And so, Dear Lucy,
your efforts were all for naught. Even though your attempts to Fit In were innocent enough, you
didn’t need to be a duck with stubby
wings, web feet or a cute quack, quack.
I loved you for who you were.
Just so, our dear
Father/Mother God, loves each of us as we truly are, no frills needed, no
change of costume or color, no false pretences about who we are. We can
be ourselves, the spiritual self we were created to be… the individual reflection of Life, Truth and
Love that are ours as God’s perfect image. As Jesus counseled: "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in
heaven is perfect. " Matthew 5
But on this day near Amman, the city named Philadelphia in Roman times and described in the Bible as the City of Brotherly Love, the shepherd with the sheep struck a chord. It brought thoughts of shepherds abiding in the field watching their flocks by night as described in the story of the birth of Jesus. In this peaceful setting even though it was close to the city, that Bible scene became very real to me. How wonderful that the birth of the Herald of God’s love, Christ Jesus as he would become known, appeared first to simple shepherds. 
